Monday, June 9, 2008
such a "great" day yst.. no morning call for mi.. i zi ji wake up.. whole day pple ignore mi.. but its all my fault.. the hurt i've caused.. muz be very deep.. same goes to mi.. due to some stupid negligence on my part.. terribly sry.. dunno wat to do to atone for my mistake.. at nite misunderstanding happened.. added on to my fan nao.. wat a great way to end my day...
gone are e good old days...
if u dun haf a single regret.. i dun tink its consider a life... life is full of regrets.. serious or minor... some could scarred u forever... there's no turning back for ur mistakes.. n there's no running away from reality.. feel so coward.. coz when there's a prob.. i tend to choose e easy way out.. run away from it.. i turn to my tv, my games.. its the only time i can get my mind off all those fan ren de shi qing.. coz i'll be very engrossed in it..
same goes to yst.. e min i reach hm.. maple till 9.. after 1hr tv break.. back to maple till abt 2.. really dun haf a moment to tink abt my prob.. juz b4 i slp, misunderstanding happen.. cant blame u guys.. coz its all true.. i dun tink i need anybody to be ard mi.. juz leave mi n my game.. let mi live in my gu pi world.. loneliness overwhelmed whole of mi.. let mi die from it ba =.=
while bathing yst, i had a tot.. always find those pple hu go suicide after breaking up wif their partner are v stupid, foolish, naive, but on e other hand.. i seem to suddenly xiang tong y they do it.. maybe they didnt end their lives entirely coz of e breakup.. they could have find themselves yi wu shi chu.. their existence is redundent.. dun haf any meaning to live as they r nt useful to e society.. suddenly xiang dao zi ji.. feel so useless once again.. hu cares if a small mi live or not in such a big world.. e sun wun stop shining, earth wun stop turning.. no contribution to society too.. done nth to be proud of my whole life till now.. guess in future nth big will happen also.. juz wasting resources living.. resources are so scare nowadays.. prices r increasing due to limited resources.. maybe i can help to save abit of it? though i haf so much negative tots, i got no courage to end my life.. if i can, i wun mind ending it n restarting all over.. tis time, nt to leave any regrets~
after i'm out of e virtual world.. i sink back to reality again.. more prob added on.. initially feel like going out, ended up totally moodless.. shall juz stick to my hse wif my game.. at least i'm free from troubles.. since last wk jiu hen xiang catch a comedy.. at least can go haf a gd laugh at e show.. but den.. dun even feel like going anywhere.. shall juz go hm ba.. simply too moodless.. hen xiang qu hai bian watch e sea.. for those hu koe mi well, i wun go anywhere alone.. but i need to be alone.. shall see when haf e time to go ba.. dunno how to go east coast.. dunno how to go west coast.. parsi ris is soooooooooo far... y jurong no sea? =.= pls build 1 for mi...
slpt at 2+ last nite.. didnt dream i guess.. today as usual, no mrn call.. wake up myself.. everything flooded back once again.. when will we get out of tis situation? tot it'll be another boring day.. though sms did came.. nth well as expected.. some say i look tired, some day i zui dudu... guess i'm juz too tired n moodless.. dun really feel like talkin much.. even though ltr going imm see kitty also nt v excited..
things seem to be turning well for frens ard mi.. tats gd~~ happy for them.. hope ni men find dao xing fu oh~~ stay happy always... v impt =)
8:25 PM
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