Thursday, November 27, 2008
initially dun plan to post anything related to 'bf'... but hai shi come le...
today marks e end... after mths of misery... loneliness... watever it is... it finally ended... been pondering abt e same topic for mths... no matter how many pple told mi i should juz end it, i still hold on to it... hoping it may turn out for e better... guess i should thx qad... wat happened gif mi a gd enough reason to end it once n for all... zai zhen mer bu she de, i still tink tis is better ba... for both of us i supposed... no pt clinging on to a rs when u koe e love isnt there anymore... it will be hard to end... but someday u still haf to face it... however i tink i need a long time to get over everything... everyday i go, i'm reminded of him... maybe it isn't a gd thing to go everywhere wif ur partner.. wherever u go, u cant shake off their shadow...
e usual places i go r also those i used to go wif him... i see strip polo tee jiu xiang dao ta... ultraman xiang dao ta... watch movie xiang dao ta... play game xiang dao ta... take bus xiang dao ta... in my hse neighbourhood xiang dao ta... how m i supposed to get over everything??? pple hu shi lian tend to go for vacation? if i can afford i definitely go le... qad would definitely say he's nt worth my tears... but i jiu hui cry ah... tink of e past yr... how we met... how we got tgt... wat we did on his bday... how things became like tis... m i e only 1 affected? doesnt wat happen between us affect him in anyway? maybe if he feels sad, i'll somewat feel more consoled at least he put in some love into tis r/s? tinking back i've done many stupid things for him... giving up frens, waiting for him for hrs, learning to make tiramisu for him... buy him stuff to surprise him...
simply a too gd example to prove my previous theory... nt u put in how much jiu can get back how much... i've given enough i supposed.. wat do i get in e end? thrown alone... till now i dun understand wat happen between us tat leads to tis... is it my fault? wat haf i nt done enough? rem all those wonderful things tat he did makes it feel worse... where's e xn tat'll travel all e way to my hse to gif mi throat swts juz coz my throat nt feeling well... where's e xn tat'll wake up early in e mrn n send mi swt sms to wish mi luk for my papers... wat brought abt e change in u? i should haf foresee tis day... but y didnt i prepare myself for tis heartbreak...
thx for all my frens hu r concern abt mi... i'll be alrite... given enough time... thx alot to qad for acc mi sms whole day... ll for acc mi watch 2movies, shop etc... shino for meeting us for movie though late le... ash,xl,jason,roch for ur concern...
but wat can i say or do except i should juz wake from tis whole thing n live my life happily again... prob is... how long do i need... suddenly xiang dao dk words... 7yrs also can juz disappear... jiu zhen de mei you tian chang di jiu de ma?
10:07 AM
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